wHats in my hEad

I wAs LatE aGain.. tHreE daYs in A roW now.. I'm in diRe nEed oF a VaCatiOn..
GraBbed aN appLe fOr toDay's BreaKfaSt beFore seTting oFf for wOrk.. I'm tRyinG mY dArneSt tO muNCh oN oNLy HeaLthY foOd.. sO no cHoCoLate bArs.. oR CanDy oF any KinD (wiTh tHe eXepTiOn oF cHewiNg GuM)

wHy iS tHat I woNder... wHy iS aLL tHat iS tempTinG aNd deLiciouS sO bAd fOr tHe boDy.. sOmetiMEs I wiShed to LiVe baCk in The daYs wHeRe everytinG waS simPLe aNd fOod haD no aRtificiaL aDditiVes of anY kinD... eRrkkhh! haHahAHaHahah

imigin Ku bebalik ka jaman (jaman eyhh hahaha ala ala sebutan abis nini) dulu atu.. memakai kain macAm nini tah kali tu.. betapih.. hahahahaha the art of menapih kain is loSt.. to me atleast.. tried it onCe whEn i slePt oVer at Granny's houSe.. forgotten to paCk my long pants for night wear... kan pakai shorts ada kana riuhkan nini hahahaha aNd so nini bagi kain "selindang" haHahaHaAHh maCam urang putih makan ambuyaT!! nalih2 menapih nda mau stay, telapas ganya akhirNya terpaKsa di pigaNg saJa.. MacAM uraNg beSunaTnyA nini usuLnya HAhaHaHAAHh

a siGht to beHoLd...

I waS juSt goiNg thRough mY friEndStEr... yOu knOw thE kiNd oF siTe tHat Gets peOpLe to sigN uP aNd shOw oFF thEir piCtuRes *wiNk*

weLL tHe veRy fiRst thiNg I loOk into evErytiMe I LoG in is tHe "vieWer proFiLe" just to See who'S viEweD my paGe.. aNd thiS oNe guY whoSe nAme is... HAhaAHaHaha nahhh! I'm noT goNNa giVe Out tHe Name.. i'LL jusT Let uR immaGInatIon ruN wiLd iN cReating a meNtaL piCtUre of hiM in yOur oWN tiMe.

BuT goLLy... He's juSt... woooOOooohhh... no woRds preVaiL... tHe moment yOu sEe hiS piCTuRe yOu aRe bLown awAy bY hiS Looks.. gOrGeouS meReLy hiNts thE tip oF the iCebErg.. HahaHaAHAHa yOu miGht thInk i'M bloWing thingS out oF proPortiOn... bUt by goLLy hs Is... GooooOOOOoooorrrrgeeeouS!!

I'd nEveR thouGht I'd saY this... buT thoSe Lame piCk-Up linES, simiLar oR somewHat in tHe conteXt aS:

I muSt bE iN heAven, cOs I'm seEing an aNgeL


doEsn't souNd sO LaMe wHen paiRed wiTh thiS Man... GosH iS it LegAL to be tHat gOOd LooKing?...
~*sWooN*~

a teAser ...

i haTe yOu! stay awaY from mE!!!

shE spat to hiS faCe... without a word he turned and walked away... long assured strides... leaving her slightly in regret for the very harsh things she'd said to him...

it was for the best... she had nothing to feel sorry about. he had it coming. but not long after she felt an uneasy feeling in the pits of her guts.... she realised he didn't deserve to be shouted at.

Even if he'd almost run her over with his slick Lexus LS460.. or the time he knocked over her very fragile centre piece.. costs a fortune.. imported too... and worse it was a gift! Or the time he spilled hot steaming coffee on her hand... ouuhh that hurt her so much tears were running down her cheeks. Was he boRn to make her life hell??! Everytime he's around either things Get brokened oR she ends up rushed to the ER. And he always had a peculiar look on his faCe whEnever their eyes met...

the next day, she woke.. the sun shinning through the drapes.. with eyes still blurRed from sleep, she struggLes to look at the time... it showed 7 in the morning..

AAAAaaa!!!! I'm Late!!

heR pitchy sCream audibLe a mile wiDe! a quick shower aNd nO bReakfast. No time foR that it seEms...

in tHe moOd foR roManCe~

I caMe doWn foR breakfaSt thiS morNinG aNd iT stRucK mE.. bEttEr maKe gooD tHe New yEarS reSoLutioN.. I mEan yEar afTer yEar I maKe a LiSt oF thiNgs tHaT I waNNa dO.. bUt iT neVer goT doNe aNd tHe piEcE oF paPer eNds uP unDer a piLe oF stuFf On mY dEsk! sO wiTh a biT oF enthuSiaSm aNd a biTTer smiLe... I pusHed awAy my pLate oF gReasy engLish bReakfast ( consisTing oF eGgs suNny siDe up, with its yoLk stiLL ruNny.. ouuHHH i"ll miSs that.. oK.. goTta bE strOng..) gOtta LiVe heaLthy!! aNd iNsteAd I GraBbed a buncH of GrapEs aNd weNt oFf for tHe oFfiCe...


UsuaLLy tHeres aPPLes buT we Ran ouT.. diD yOu knOw apPLes aRe aS goOd inFact eVen a beTTer RepLacEment to chEwinG guM?.. nEed FreshEning up without tHe hasSle oF brushinG youR teEth?! cHew oN aN apPLe! (tHough it doesn't meaN you sHouLd start eating appLes aNd stOp tHe reQuiRed daiLy tEeth bruShinGs!!) ahahHahaHaha

oN tHat subJect.. soMethiNg oFf topiC aLtogethEr... I waS aLso reminiscing aboUt tHis cRazeeeeeY iDea I haD oF beComing tHe neXt RomAnCe noVeL beSt sELLer HAHAAHhahahhaHah... OR eVen tHe nExt J.k. RowLing ... On tHat noTe I weNt iN seArch (which basicaLLy meaNs I gooGLed it! stoiiinkk!) of thiNgs tHat u nEed to becomiNg a beSt seLLinG RomAnCe noVeL wRitEr..

• yOu nEed to kNow tHe diFfereNt tyPes oF roManCe noVeLs.. TheRes.. COnTermporAry RomaNce.. iNspiratioNaL roManCe.. HiStoRicaL roManCe (onE of my faVoriTes baCK in coLLege)... wHooooHh aTu yA... naNinG juA kePaLe meMikiRinnnn hahahaha boWh keluaR loGat indOn!
• yOu NeeD gOoD reSouRceS (to pRoVe tHat yOu'Re noT juSt a WnnaBe!) to maKe stroNg tHe chaRacTerS.. tHe pLot.. tHe creaTiviTy.. wAAAaLaaaaN! sO HaRd LoH!
• LaSt GetiTinG iT puBLiSheD! YouR aRe goNna nEEd to hAve coNNectioNs.. by ThaT I mEan so tHaT tHe boOk DOeSn't gEt pubLisHed uNdEr a diFFereNt nAME!!... aWu naLih-naLih uRang mengerajaKan, saNang-sAnaNg dicUrinyA?! sumpah ya jaDi baTU!! bacakAn yaSin kAh!! biAr ya LumpaT kepanaSaN!! haAHahAHaha emosi aku ahh~~ hahahah
  

iT's noT eAsy tO boComiNg a WritEr... tHeRe's JuSt So maNy tHinGs tO puT into ConsiDeraTioN!... I'm exHausTed eVen thiNkinG abouT it.. maYbe i'll thiNk aboUt that oNe anoTher tiMe...

iTs aLL aboUt TechniQue..

I neEded a picK-Me-Up-Er.. sO as uSuaL I weNt to fUnny weBsiTes aNd bumpEd aCrOsS tHis oNe veRy diSturbiNg yEt fuNNy reVeLatiOn Of hOw your techniques in farting couLd tell more about yourself.. you reaLLy needn't read the sentence agaiN... yUp yOu reAd it riGht.. FART! I'm volantarily and undisputably talking about natural secretion of bodily waste product!

Orang yang kantut pastu salahkan orang lain
MaknanyA kedia: Nda Jujur

Orang yang tahan kantut berjam-jam
MaknanyA kedia: Bangang

Orang yang kantut dengan lantang
MaknanyA kedia: Yakin Dengan Dirinya

Orang yang kantut dalam selimut dan kibaskan baunya
MaknanyA kedia: Sadis

Orang yang sembunyikan bau kantut dangan ketawa kuat-kuat
MaknanyA kedia: Strategik

Orang yg kantut tapi nda dapat dikesan
MaknanyA kedia: Misterius

Kantut bila dikajutkan
MaknanyA kedia: Gugup

Kantut pelahan-pelahan selepas itu senyum sorang-sorang
MaknanyA kedia: Periang

*haHAhaHaHahAHAhAHAHAHhahah*
wHoEver creaTed thiS is eiTher vEry crEatiVe or veRy boREd!!

He's DeaD!

Heath Ledger.. a budding ActOr.. wAs pRonounCed Dead toDay..
I jusT LoGgeD ouT of my hotmail anD on tHe spreAd oF msn wEb page.. tHere iT was...
Heath LedgEr deAd at 28.

he's deaD?... wHooHhh... sHocKing... genuiNeLy.... I thouGht hE'd bE tHe nExt Brad piTt.. sO mucH potenTiaL in him to be thE next bEst ActoR in hoLLywooD... I enjoYed hiS roLe in "10 things I hate about you".. aNd my favorite "tHe patrioT"...

hiS LatEst fiLm (if i'm not mistakEn so don't go quoting me on that).. aNd finaL oNe it sEems.. He waS cAst aS a viLLian in The up cominG BatmaN movie.. Something I'LL sureLy watch oNce iTs reLeased at thE moviEs.. gOsh Cant believe he's actually gone... tHe mEdia iS iN a fRenzie sEconD GuEssiNg The aCtuaL CauSe oF deaTh.. aNd I beT tHere'D be sOme Very diStuRbiNg sTory oR thEorY tO hiS deaTh beIng conCocTed... bUt I can hoNestLy saY.. hiS death is a biG LosS to tHe fiLm iNduStry..

He suReLy wiLL be miSsed...

tO bE "QuotEd"

So tHerE I waS inTenSe at woRk.. My miNd DevoTed to GettIng it doNe.. wHen aLL oF a suDDen I haD a SudDen uRge to taKe a bReak... cOs iT wAs aLL juSt geTtinG to mE..

sO i dEciDed to chEck tHe emaiLs.. aNd guEss wHat?!
I goT foRwaRded a bLOg pOst I hAd maDe noT a wEek ago... aNd iT was woRd by WoRD!! *HAhahahahHAHAAHHhahahahAHAHAhaaha*
tHis muSt bE whAt iT feLt LikE being pLaigiariSed! buT no matTer... I niCked tHe sTory off a weBsiTe oF fuLL fun aNd joKes...

so Ermmm tHankS MiSs Nite_butteRfLy (weLL youR email was the first amongst the long liSt of forward e-addresSes).. foR a fraCtioN of a SeconD thEre.. yOu maDe me feeL likE a ceLebrity *HAHaHaAHAhahaHaha*

Hey Least I knoW peoPLe actUaLLy Read mY bLog.. duM duM diDuMMmm~

SwEenEy ToDD

I'm noT mUch a Fan oF musiCaLs.. BuT wHen I heArd JoHnNy DepP was in oNe I juMpEd aT tHe inVitatiOn to waTch it. tHe sEttiNg wAs in oLd LoNdoN wHeRe PEoPLe LooKed LiKe tHey diDn't haVe shoWers aNd eVerYthiNG LoOkeD caRtooNy... aSiDe fRoM tHe GoRey mUrdEr sCenEs.. iT wAs muCh fuN aNd aS uSuaL JohNny DepP iS a taLent tHat MEritS aLL cRedit... He pLayEd hiS chAracTer weLL aNd I ReaLLy didN't LikE hiM in tHe moVie.. He pLayEd a viLe Man who'D loSt aLL sEnSe oF puRity wiTh a hEart fiLLed wiTh RevEnge.. He aNd HeLEnA BonhAm cArtEr, aRe fAvoritE pLayErs iN Tim BuRtoN's fiLm.

I wouLdn't reComeNd oN brIngiNg tHe kiDdieS to waTch thiS onE. tOO cyniCaL aNd toO muCh BrutaLity... eVen I couLdn't heLp bUt coVer my eYes at thE muDer sCenEs..

P/s- I couLdn't stoMach LookiNG at any mEat piEs, quiChe oR any oF tHe soRt aFter waTchinG the moVie... *shuddEr*

MadNeSs..

I thiNk I havE roAd Rage. I can't deNy it... buT nOt to woRRy... it's unDer tHe list oF neW yeaRs thinGs- To-iMprOve-On... sO tHe pLan iS.. wHen anD iF I enCounTer tHoSe iDioTic dRivErs wHo thiNk thEy oWn tHe bLooDy roAd.... I'd taKe a DeeP dEep BreatH... aNd thiNk HapPy ThouGhts! gooD pLan eY?!

AnyHo... LasT niGht aS i wAs driVing hoMe... fEeLinG aLL grOggy aNd reaDy to juMp iNto tHe saCk.. I wAs giVen aN inSighT oF wHat TruE roAd raGe iS aLL abOut! tWo cArs sEeminGLy haRmLEss WerE DriVing aT a ridicuLouSLy sLow pAce aNd oN thE faSt LanE toO..

On cLosEr inSpeCtioN tHey WeRe acTuaLLy beiNg veRy caReLesS aNd maKinG tHe roAd theIr pLaygRounD!! baiTinG eAch oTher... jUst aN aCciDent waiTing to hAppeN reaLLy...
I couLdn'T beLieVe aT hoW soMe peOpe cAn gEt so cHiLdiSh on tHe roAd... I don'T knoW whO sTarTed wHat, oR hoW iT evEn staRteD. BuT reaLLy iF yOu aRe beiNg taiL gatEd on tHe fast LanE iTs oNLy LogiC to mOve awaY aNd geT iNto tHe Left Lane aND Let tHe ChAsed-By-tHe-DeviL drIvEr tHrouGH! Its no LaughinG maTTer... poEpLe Die duE to RecKLesS driVing!!

aNd tHerE thEy weRe ResoLving theiR pEttY ArguMent oN tHe bLoody roAd bY beinG uTTer mOROnS! diDn't thEy reaLisE tHat iT invoLves oTher driVers too! I SeriouSLy thiNk tHeRe shoULd bE a New syLLabuS in dRiving cLaseS wHiCh is ROAD ETIQUETTE!! before they Let anyoNe behiNd thE wHeeLs! I'm onE to taLk *in a mutterEd whisper tone*
haHaHaHAhAHaHaH

bUsTeD!!

wHen wiLL Men LeaRn tHat God GavE woMen a sixTh seNse
(gEraK haTi.. cakap melayunya i think..)
tHey Can sMeLL a cHeatEr a miLe aWay... saYing thAt, iF yOu thiNk yoU goT aWay wiTh chEatinG witH anotHer woMan.. cHancEs aRe tHe wiFey aLready knoWs.. iTs a mAtTer oF wHetheR tHey waNna deAL wiTH tHe pHiLandeRing sCOunDreL a.K.a. tHe huBby "deaRest"... Or LeaVe iT to God to dO tHe juSt puNisHment.


bUt hEY HeRe's aN eXampLe oF hoW to go abOut caTchinG tHem Red-HaNded!!
wAhaHAHAha *eViL LaugH*

NEVER LIE TO A WOMAN!

A man called home to his wife and said, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his Friends. We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that Promotion I'v been wanting, so could you please pack enough Clothes for a week and set out my rod and fishing box, we're Leaving From the office & I will swing by the house to pick my things up Oh! Please pack my new blue silk pajamas."

The wife thinks this sounds a bit fishy but being the good wife she is, did exactly what her husband asked.

The following Weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking good.

The wife welcomed him home and asked if he caught many fish?

He said, "Yes! Lots of Salmon, some Bluegill, and a few Swordfish. But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pajamas like I asked you to Do?"

You'll love the answer...

The wife replied, "I did. They're in your fishing box....."

BUSTED!!!!
*haHAhaHahaH *

to tHe nEwLy wEds

Lets Kick sTart tHe neW yeaR wiTh LaughTer aLL arOund :D
sOmetHing I thOught waS CraziLy fuNNy..

Suasana masih riuh di luar. Sanak saudara semuanya berkampung disini. Gelak ketawa, gurau senda jelas kedengaran. Aku memimpin isteriku ke dalam bilik pengantin. Suara-suara sumbang terlalu banyak yang menegurku.

"Hai, malam masih muda, dah nak masuk tidur?" sapa Pak Ucu. "Orang muda bang Aji, biarlah. Air dah penuh kat kepala tu." sahut PakTam disambut hilai ketawa sanak saudara yang lain. Meriah sungguh keadaan diluar walau jam sudah menunjukkan pukul 11.00 malam.

Hadiah yang masih belum dibuka ku susun ke tepi. Lampu ku tutup. Merebah diri ke katil
pengantin, aku menoleh ke arah isteriku.

"Kita tidur dulu lah yer. Ramai sangat orang kat luar tu." Isteriku hanya mengangguk tanda setuju. Entah pukul berapa sekarang, aku pun tidak tahu. Keadaan di luar gelap gelita dan senyap sunyi. Tanda sanak saudaraku telah pulang dan keluargaku telah tidur.

Jari jemariku lembut membelai rambutnya. Ku selak rambut ikal yang menutupi telinganya lalu membisikkan "Assalammualaikum!" ke telinganyauntuk menguji isteriku.

"Wa alaikummussalam." Rupanya isteriku masih belum tidur. Ku kucup pipi halusnya. Ku kucup dahinya yang mulus. Semerbak harumnya menusuk deria bauku. Akanku tunaikan
tanggungjawabku sebagai suami malam ini. Jari-jemari ini terus membelai tubuhnya. Perasaanku tidak dapat dikawal lagi, namun...

"Kringggggg...."

"Tik..tik..tik..tik..."

"Kring.. kring..kring.."

Bunyi-bunyi jam loceng entah dari mana memenuhi ruang bilikku. Terkejut dengan segala
macam bunyi yang ada, aku membuka lampu. Serentak itu, terang benderang seluruh rumahku. Bunyi-bunyi ini telah berjaya membangunkan semua orang di rumahku.

Aku mencari-cari punca bunyi-bunyi itu. Mataku terarah ke sekotak hadiah yang masih terbalut rapi. Aku buka dengan pantas dan di dalamnya terdapat 5 buah jam loceng. Juga sekeping kad berbunyi... Selamat Pengantin Baru, Jangan gopoh-gopoh. Baru Pukul 2 pagi. Jangan maree.. kami potong stim. Ikhlas dari : saHabaT-SahAbaT duNia akHiraT mu!

NoW tHat's an iDea foR a WedDing PreSent ;)
*HAhaHAHaHaHaHaHaHaHA*

coLouR mE bLonDe

I've always hAd a sEcrEt wiSh (nOt seCret aNymoRe *duh*) of becoming a blonDe...
hoWever puTting My skiN coLouR into coNsiDeraTion.. I tHink Its beTTer noT to vEntuRe on to soMe verY traGic Look... *shuDder* haHa

AnyWay I thought tHis bLondE joKe meRits a MentioN..

The Jealous Blonde

A blonde who suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly, opens the door, and, sure enough, finds him naked in the arms of a redhead. Well, now she’s angry. She opens her purse and takes out the gun. But as she does so, she is overcome with grief and points the gun at her own head.

The boyfriend yells, “No, honey, don’t do it.”

“Shut up,” she says. “You’re next.”

kWang~~~ kwaNg~~~kwaNG!!!

a tOucH oF hoPe..

Memories I leave behiNd... nOt forgottEn... juSt pUt asiDe so I doN't gEt diStraCted... I nEed to cOnceNtratE... NeeD to pLeDge coMmitment oN a prOjEct tHat Lay uNtOucHed.

Hoping tHe neW year bRingS a nEw begiNning aNd nEw thiNgS mY wAy...


MoRe to come.. ;)

a NeW yeaR dAwNs..

I'm geTtinG myseLf a giaNt poSter enliStiNg thiS yeaRs resoluTionS!

*siLenT pRaYer*

I juSt toOk a moMent to Say a pRayEr.. hoPinG tHat thiS yeAr I geT to AchiEve ALL thAt I've bEen hopIng to aChieVe... hmmMmmm... 2008.

ten years ago it seeMeD liKe 2008 wouLd bring iN flyiNg cArs aNd wE'd be teLepoRting ouRsELves as meaNs of trAvEL.... nothiNg of tHe sorT yet buT a loT haS chAngeD aNd many otHer siGnificaNt thiNgs haVe beeN achEiVed.

thingS in my liFe so faR in tHe first feW dayS of tHe nEw yeaR..
Today.. woKe uP at 5 a.m. reaLisinG tHat its a wEekdaY.. woRkday.. whispered to myself.. five minutes... just five more minutEs... eyEs cloSinG... sLumbEr cRept in...
juMpeD off bEd whEn eyeS oPeneD agaiN!! dAyLighT briGht aNd shiNing tHrough tHe dRapEs.. noThing nEw hEre.. saME oL rOutiNe aS LAst yeaRs... neEds chaNging I thougHt to mysELf.. wiLL try agaiN toMorRow... bUt wiLL I?...

*another silent prayer*

God heLp me...